Even though I was my children’s homeschool teacher through high school, my children taught me some very important lessons as well. Here are my top 5 homeschool lessons my children taught me:
1. Maria Montessori was right. You really can follow the child.
Throughout my children’s childhoods, my husband and I used Maria Montessori’s philosophy of child-led learning. One of my favorite quotes is
“Let us leave the life free to develop within the limits of the good, and let us observe this inner life developing. This is the whole of our mission.” – Maria Montessori
By observing my children over the years, I learned that it was safe to just let my children show me what was right for them. Often, my husband and I gave Will and Christina opportunities to experience different activities.
Then we let their natural tendencies and interests choose which to stay with. We gave Will and Christina experience with a number of sports, especially skiing, roller skating, ice skating, karate, and tennis. They also experienced piano lessons, drum lessons (Will), voice lessons, and dance.
Both Will and Christina chose ice skating as their favorite sport. Our whole family had amazing, life-changing experiences through figure skating, and Will and Christina both found careers in figure skating. Will had an interest in music and DJing, so he became a DJ at age 15. Will is still a DJ, too, with his own business, Dancing DJ Productions. Christina was always a dancer – and became a professional ice dancer and choreographer.
2. If I have questions, I just need to ask.
I learned from homeschoolers that I just needed to ask questions at homeschool conferences, seminars, and groups. (Now there are lots of online places to ask questions as well!). In the same way, I just needed to ask my children if I was wondering about something. Was it time to try a new curriculum, or did they like the one we were using? What did they want to study this year? What did they plan to study in college? Should we drop an old tradition and try a new one?
3. Homeschooling truly is about family.
My children didn’t want or need school at home. They needed homeschool. The more I could merge our schooling and family, the happier we all were.
As we went through the years of homeschooling, our homeschool looked less and less like school at home and more like our family doing schoolwork as part of our normal day and family activities. We learned to embrace the freedom homeschooling gave us to go out and do fun, educational activities during the school day and take family trips when others were in school. We loved being able to say: “This is our school day. Is this cool – or what?!”
4. I don’t have to be perfect.
It wasn’t unusual for me to not plan or record our homeschool activities as well as I should have. And sometimes we just got totally off schedule. But what was great was that Will and Christina didn’t worry about that. So I really didn’t spend a lot of time worrying about it, either. And guess what … it didn’t matter to anyone in the end. What Will and Christina missed in direction from me they got from themselves. And that self-direction helped them both earn straight A’s throughout their bachelor’s degrees (and helped them love their college experiences)!
5. All you need is love. (via my children and the Beatles).
Many wonder how much education and training is needed for parents to homeschool their children. Yes, I had a bachelor’s degree. And that helped us homeschool without hassles from anyone (since people assumed I knew what I was doing as a teacher).
But I wasn’t certified to teach in a public school. My bachelor’s degree was in liberal studies with a concentration in Montessori elementary and early childhood education.
Having a bachelor’s degree (of any type) enabled me to administer the required biennial standardized testing in Colorado (which allowed us to test at times throughout the day that worked with OUR schedule during OUR set testing week). And my Montessori certification definitely helped me confidently use the Montessori principles I love with my children.
But a degree or teacher certification certainly wouldn’t have been necessary. I truly believe that parents without any formal teacher training can be wonderful homeschool teachers. With homeschool conferences, seminars, online support, local homeschool groups and tutors, teachers’ manuals and educational supplies, anyone who is committed to homeschooling can find a way to teach the ones they love.
Of course, not everyone is meant to homeschool, and that’s fine, too. But if you do want to go the homeschooling route, my children showed me that it’s easier than I would have thought. All we really needed was the love for each other that led us to find a way to do what was best.
Learn more about my eBook Montessori at Home or School: How to. Teach Grace and Courtesy!
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Mrs Green says
what an amazing post – you must be so proud of everything you have achieved and thank you for sharing all your insights. We home schooled for 3 years and now my daughter is flexi schooling. For me, home education required a lot of trust and I found it hard to trust myself, and perhaps my DD too I’m ashamed to say; but looking at your story I needn’t have worried. 😉
Deb says
Thanks so much for your very kind comment! Trusting myself was probably the most difficult part of homeschooling. That’s why I’m happy I can tell others that you don’t have to worry about that. But homeschooling really isn’t for every family, and you may have been led to a different situation that’s perfect for your family, too! I wish you and your family the very best educational experience for your family!
Counting Coconuts says
A lovely post, as always, Deb! While I feel excited and confident about our homeschooling adventure, reading your words gives me even more hope and comfort in the idea. Thank you for sharing this!
Deb says
Thanks so much!I’m glad my post gave you more hope and comfort about homeschooling. I think feeling comfortable and relaxed about homeschooling really is the most difficult part.
Lauren says
I just love the way you talk about your homeschooling, Deb. It sounds so natural and fun and supportive, and look at the wonderful examples your children are now of homeschooling’s benefits. I love that they’ve developed such interesting talents and found their own special paths through life so far. Every time I read a post of yours about homeschooling, I grow a little less anxious that I won’t do everything “right” if we choose that route for our children (as we wish to).
I enjoyed visiting your children’s sites! I can see maintaining quality websites runs in the family. 🙂
Deb says
Thanks for your very kind words, Lauren! I really can’t say enough good things about homeschooling for families who feel called to homeschool. And thanks for visiting my kids’ sites! They’ll love hearing that you enjoyed them. They don’t have as much time to spend blogging as I do, but I’m so proud of what they’ve done!
Kay Meyer says
This post is very encouraging – especially now, when I am looking at the calendar and my list of what I hope to have done by the end of the year. Two of my children graduated from homeschool and are doing well, even though we didn’t get everything done that I had hoped to do. I need to be careful not to take the joy out of homeschooling by fussing so much when things take longer than I hope. Thank you for the reminder. 🙂
Deb says
Thanks for your comment, Kay! It’s great that our kids do well even when we didn’t get everything done that we had wanted to do. It’s so much fun to look in retrospect and realize that everything is perfect in its imperfection!
Rebecca B says
I have been following this blog for a while, but it’s the first time that I have made a comment. Your blog is actually the first exposure that I’ve had with Montessori education and Maria Montessori herself. One particular nugget of advice stuck out as I read this post: I like your family’s perspective on letting your children choose their own interests through “natural tendencies”. My daughter is 17 months old and I must admit that I have a lot of her future planned out, but bottom line, is that she needs to enjoy the activities (e.g. playing the piano) or she won’t succeed or have a positive experience. When the time comes (to introduce new skills, music lessons, hobbies, etc), I definitely need to step back and let her lead the way. Thanks for that insight!
Deb says
Thanks so much for your comment, Rebecca! Letting our children lead the way really moved our family in unexpected directions. My husband and I thought it more likely that our kids would go into academic fields or music (which both my husband and I were drawn to). But my kids inherited athletic genes from my husband and an interest in performance from who knows where??! How different (for the worse!) all of our lives would have been if we wouldn’t have used child-led learning!
Dionna says
I am so nervous about homeschooling Kieran. I feel like I don’t have the energy, the mental fortitude, the patience. Reading your posts always make me feel a little bit more confident. Thank you Deb!
Deb says
Thanks, Dionna! I know you’ll do an awesome job of homeschooling Kieran – you actually tend to do much more than is needed. So you have a definite cushion to just relax and enjoy the journey!
Alicia says
This is a wonderful story about homeschooling. It’s great to hear that your children found great passions in some of the experiences that you offered.
Deb says
Thank you for your kind words, Alicia! It’s been so much fun seeing how the interests my kids had when they were little became such an important part of their adultt lives. And it’s wonderful to see them have a passion for and success in their work as adults because of it.
stefanie says
i rarely (maybe never) comment but always really enjoy your blog and this post especially is very encouraging. i’m leaning strongly toward homeschooling, but my son is only just one and i’m going to see if he expresses a preference in some way. but in any case, so much of your insight and experience can be applied to parenthood in general. thank you!
Deb says
Thanks, Stefanie! Following your child can definitely be applied regardless of your child’s educational environment. We still use it to help our children as adults. When they ask us for guidance, we always try to help them find where their interests and tendencies are leading them.
Michelle says
I love to hear about homeschoolers who successfully went on to further study and work on what they’re passionate about! It can be hard to see to the end of the road when I’m standing at the very start of it. I hope to be able to follow my children’s interests and see where we end up too!
Deb says
Thanks for your comment, Michelle! It is really fun to see where the road is leading, but what a great journey it was! Even though I loved every phase of homeschooling, I’ll always miss the early years. (Can you tell I was a former preschool teacher?!!) 🙂
Lindsey says
Thank you for this post! As a Mama of little ones, it can be hard to imagine what homeschooling could look like for us. Whatever path we end up taking (homeschool, private, supplemental, etc), I’d love for my son and daughter to lead the way.
Deb says
You’re welcome – and thanks for your comment, Lindsey! Have fun discovering your family’s path. If you let your children lead the way, you should have lots of fun – no matter what direction your family’s path takes!
Erin says
Thank you for this. I’ve been trying to explain unschooling, homeschooling on my blog and I don’t feel I’ve done it justice. I’m a Montessori fan, I’ve read her books and am a firm believer in child led learning. Alas, I’m a teacher in a system that doesn’t allow for it and I need the income for care for my family so my kids are in public school instead of all of us at home….sigh…maybe some day.
Deb says
Thanks for your comment, Erin! Fortunately, following your child is something you can do at home regardless of your child’s educational situation. And with your knowledge of Montessori principles and educational expertise, I’m sure you’re doing lots of wonderful things for your kids!
Jenn says
I stumbled across your blog and so happy that I did. I am a first year homeschooling Mommy and definitely enjoyed reading your homeschooling story. Often, I go through periods where I lack confidence and wonder if we have made the right decision for our children. But, I am so happy I came across your blog as it was exactly what I needed … perfect words and perfect timing. Your words and story were so uplifting and encouraging. Thank you.
Deb says
Thanks so much for your kind comment, Jenn! I’m so happy my post was encouraging for you. As homeschool parents, what we’re typically lacking is simply the ability to trust ourselves.
SomeGirl says
Thank you for the freedom you give us moms in the middle of homeschooling now. You are so full of grace!
Btw, my husband and I spent part of our honeymoon in Praque… it was SO BEAUTIFUL!
SomeGirl says
(just realized that might not have made much sense…)
By freedom, I mean the freedom to branch out, do different things, follow our children’s interest and not feel tied to school at home. I’ve visited too many other homeschool blogs and left feeling like I needed to open more books and do more worksheets, but I always leave your blog feeling free! 🙂 (that makes more sense now, right?);)
Deb says
It made sense to me! But I love and appreciate your explanation, Michelle!
Deb says
Thanks so much for your very kind comment, Michelle!! We just loved Prague. I’ve heard a lot of people say Prague is the most beautiful city in the world … and it’s definitely up there at or near the top!
Betsy at Zen Mama says
Great post Deb!
What wonderful adventures you had with your kids. What wonderful children you have and what love between you all.
I love the Carnival of Natural Parenting idea. I’ll have to join next week. Sounds like my latest blog, It’s the Little Things In Life, would fit right in!
Deb says
Thanks so much for your very kind words, Betsy! I am definitely proud of my children, and we are still always very close even when we can’t be together.
It would be great for you to be in the Carnival of Natural Parenting – I’m sure everyone would love your posts! The Carnival is just once a month and has a different topic each month. Just click on the Natural Parent badge at the end of my post for information about the Carnival of Natural Parenting topics for February and March!
JDaniel4's Mom says
I love to follow JDaniel around and see what he finds for us to do.
Thanks for stopping by.
Deb says
That’s great! You’re so much more likely to stay in tune with what JDaniel’s interests are that way.
Karen Greenberg says
This is a great post! It’s amazing what we can learn from our children if we take the time to listen. I really enjoyed learning a little about homeschooling- a topic of fascination for me. Thanks for linking up to the Teacher Appreciation blog hop. You are DEFINITELY appreciated!
Deb says
Thanks so much for your kind comment, Karen! And your blog hop idea is great! I’ll have to return to read more of the posts. Have a wonderful weekend! 🙂
casey byrd says
plz visit my blog and read the article i JUST published about Montessori _ i copied your quote bc it was cute. anyway i need some advice.. would you tweeet out my post to readers or on facebook and help me get some opinions? Thanks!
http://1caseycolette.blogspot.com/2011/05/montessori-schools-whats-your-opinion.html
Deb says
Thanks, Casey! I’m on my way to read your article now! 🙂
radar5 says
You are such an inspiration! My little ones are 10, 8, and 5. It’s so great to hear the stories of parents and children who are on the other side of the school years and are excelling!
Your blog has been very helpful to me so far this school year. 🙂
Jenny says
Thank you Deb so much.
I sat and bawled reading this post and especially listening to the Beatles 🙂
You have helped me face my fears and given me the encouragement I’ve needed to just get started and give my children the best of what I have to offer.
I will be a regular visitor to your blog I’m sure! Thanks again.
Lacie S. says
Very inspirational! We are deciding if homeschooling is for us and I really do think it boils down to family. Children can have so many rich experiences in the family unit learning together. Reading about your children’s success and finding their true passions in life as careers to fulfill them brings me great hope! Thank you!